Big Fart

[glen]

There is this mackem couple, they live 12 miles S.E of Newcastle, and every morning the husband wakes the wife up at around eight farting. One morning the wife says to the husband "You know what it is, one of these mornings you're going to fart your guts out". "Don't be stupid woman" was his reply. Well a couple of days later the wife woke up early, so she decided she would get her own back on the husband. She went down stairs to the kitchen and got the turkey. She removed all the giblets and guts from the turkey, ran upstairs and carefully put them down the back of her husbands boxer shorts while he was sleeping, and then returned to the kitchen. Sure enough at around eight o'clock the husband awoke and gave off one of his biggest and best farts. The wife was listening downstairs and all she heard after was "Ahhh! Jesus Christ" and then running to the toilet. After about ten minutes the husband came out of the bathroom and sauntered downstairs entering the kitchen looking very sheepish indeed. "What's the matter with you ?" asked the wife. "Well" said the husband. "You know the other day when you said I would fart my guts out one of these days?" "Yes" said the wife, " Ummm! well it happened this morning. And if it hadn't have been for that jar of vaseline I found in the bathroom I wouldn't have gettin' the bloody thing tucked back in"

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